J. Ojanpera

As if you were looking out Looking out for anything Almost as if you missed us You missed everything Hope, life, faith All we knew was what they said If you really loved If we really knew This world, my world Would surely be better "Trust you", they said Nothing I see can be trusted Carried away one day Ignoring every sign No prophet will tell me If anyone is coming Show them the way Directions are not his forte' He'll never show He never even came If he did, it wasn't for a bank Glad you have the job I never was much for lies If you wait long, you'll be the first to know

There has been a wave of -mostly unqualified- advice blogs in the writing world lately, and it has inspired me to do the same. My qualifications consist of an eighteen year relationship with a wonderful woman, sixteen of those married. No certificates, just raw life experience. We also threw four daughters into the mix, which makes success possible against all odds. We are equally imperfect. We haven't used magic to date because we have found ways to keep the magic between us alive all this time. In true advice form, I have compiled a list of pointers that just might help. I am assuming that both partners care for, and desire a better relationship. 1. The give-give cycle. The man who married us taught us this principle. He told us that it is impossible to out-give each other, and if we are always giving to the other, neither of us should be left wanting. This is difficult sometimes due to life, but it works. It takes practice and patience. 2. Accept the seasons, and know that yo...